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Various. Internet. Whatchamacallits.
Sep 17 '14

cudrage:

Katt Williams on Dave Chappelle: “But Dave Chappelle was decapitated in front of us. And until we deal that. Until we deal with the fact that a devout Muslim was accused of being a crackhead. And until we establish the fact that they said he went to Africa to smoke cocaine when we know they don’t have running water and food over there. When they don’t have paved roads over there. You saying he flew past Chicago and Miami and LA and New York and Detroit, you saying he went past Cleveland and Fort Pierce, Florida, and he went past Okeechobee and Oakland, you saying he went all the way to another country where they not eating? You talking about somebody who has a wife and children, five children, and lives on a farm, he doesn’t live here in Hollywood. You saying you convince people that person was an insane crackhead? And he hasn’t been on movies and TV for eight years is that correct? Ok then don’t tell me about what you wanna tell me, I just watched you decapitate him in front of me… Then when he made 500 million dollars, even though his contract said he was supposed to get half of it, they said he made too much for the contract to be valid, so we’ll offer you 10% of what you made. You mean he made 500 million and they offered him 50? Yes. And he said, “what do you think my fans are gonna say? When they find out you offered me 10% of what I made you.” And they said, “your fans will believe that you’re a crazy crackhead by the time you get home.” And my nigga got on a flight in LA and by the time he got to Ohio it was so. And eight years later he hasn’t been in a movie or television and is just now trying to do his real comeback in Radio City Music Hall. It’s bees like that sometimes.”

(Source: kanyeuniversecity)

33,262 notes (via oh-harbs & kanyeuniversecity)

Sep 13 '14

mmmsimpsons:

Conan O’Brien at The Simpsons Take the Hollywood Bowl

more here with Weird Al and Jon Lovitz

94 notes (via thesimpsonsforever & mmmsimpsons)

Sep 12 '14

poldberg:

While there is a lot of appropriate rage about Ferguson right now, the killing of John Crawford, III is getting less attention than it deserves. I put Shaun King’s tweets and history lesson on the matter in chronological order for easier consumption.

Links:

Autopsy and video show John Crawford shot from behind in Wal-Mart

Witness in murder of John Crawford changes story

You really should be following Shaun King on Twitter.

89,270 notes (via drujohnston & poldberg)

Sep 11 '14

(Source: 90skindofworld)

19,716 notes (via yourekillingmebuster & 90skindofworld)

Sep 10 '14

staff:

Today’s the day. The day you help save the internet from being ruined.

Ready? 

Yes, you are, and we’re ready to help you.

(Long story short: The FCC is about to make a critical decision as to whether or not internet service providers have to treat all traffic equally. If they choose wrong, then the internet where anyone can start a website for any reason at all, the internet that’s been so momentous, funny, weird, and surprising—that internet could cease to exist. Here’s your chance to preserve a beautiful thing.)

180,456 notes (via afsoltys & staff)

Sep 8 '14

Safe In My Hands | Allstate LGBT Campaign

Sep 7 '14

6,905 notes (via afsoltys & iquantny)

Sep 6 '14
"Mr. Burns, A Post-Electric Play" uses the "The Simpsons" to portray a dystopian future. Photo by Joan Marcus

I really, really, really wish I saw this when it was playing in NYC. 

"Mr. Burns, A Post-Electric Play" uses the "The Simpsons" to portray a dystopian future. Photo by Joan Marcus

I really, really, really wish I saw this when it was playing in NYC. 

Tags: the simpsons mr. burns a post electric play

Sep 6 '14

What FXX’s Marathon Taught Us About The Greatest ‘Simpsons’ Writer Ever, John Swartzwelder

troy48:

image

John Swartzwelder is the greatest “Simpsons” writer of all-time. He’s also a total recluse.

See on uproxx.com

3 notes (via troy48)

Sep 5 '14

(Source: The Onion)

22,332 notes (via oh-harbs & cockenblog)

Sep 5 '14
ucbcomedy:

newyorker:

Today’s daily cartoon by Benjamin Schwartz.

Thanks Joan.

ucbcomedy:

newyorker:

Today’s daily cartoon by Benjamin Schwartz.

Thanks Joan.

2,486 notes (via ucbcomedy & newyorker)

Sep 4 '14
Joan Rivers’ funeral requests via her book ‘I Hate Everyone…Starting with Me’.
Lost an icon today. 

Joan Rivers’ funeral requests via her book ‘I Hate Everyone…Starting with Me’.

Lost an icon today. 

17 notes (via lnicoleadler)Tags: joan rivers

Sep 2 '14

(Source: yeah-yougotme)

328,993 notes (via rewritemyhistory & yeah-yougotme)

Aug 29 '14

95 notes (via ucbcomedy & laughingsquid)

Aug 28 '14

cognitivedissonance:

creepyold-kit-hands:

coelasquid:

throughthewildblue:

You cannot buy electronics with food stamps. You cannot buy cigarettes with food stamps. You cannot buy pet food with food stamps. You cannot withdraw money with an EBT card (food stamps).

Do you know what else you can’t buy with food stamps? Shampoo, soap, laundry detergent, toilet paper, paper towels, tissues, tinfoil, plastic sandwich bags, toothpaste, cleaning products, tampons, pads, over the counter medications (such as Tylenol, Ibuprofen, etc.), and anything else you can think of that you cannot physically ingest for nutritional purposes.

Do you know what you can buy with food stamps? Food.

Do you know what it’s like to scrounge for change to buy non-edible necessities, use a credit card and EBT card (food stamps) during the same transaction, and then have the person in line behind you judge you for buying the ingredients to make a birthday cake?

People who disseminate false information about food stamps have never had to use food stamps.

Okay, but let’s talk for a second about how that one lady called turkey “big chicken”

You can’t even buy all food with food stamps. You just… you flat-out can’t buy “food that will be eaten in the store/any food sold for on-premises consumption” or any “hot foods” with food stamps—meaning you can’t buy anything hot, you can’t buy anything that gets blended together, you can’t buy anything “pre-prepared,” in most cases you can’t use your EBT card at restaurants. You literally CANNOT purchase a milkshake with food stamps, because it’s considered “sold for on-premises consumption” (which was ridiculous at the place I worked, because the customer had to mix their own milkshake themself with a little machine we provided them, and several people got upset—rightfully so, I think—that it wasn’t covered under food stamps, because they often only found out at the register after already mixing it, often as a treat for their kids). You literally can’t walk into a gas station, grab one of those hot dogs off their grills/out of the little heated food area, and buy it with food stamps, because it’s hot.

And when I say “can’t,” I don’t mean “if the cashier notices you trying and cares enough to stop you, they’ll refuse to do it for you.” I mean “it is actually impossible to do this.” I’m not even sure these people who disseminate false information about food stamps have paid any attention at all when buying things at the store, because what happens is: We scan in the customer’s items, into our computer. The computer has specific codes for the items and rules for what it will let you pay for things with. We scan the customer’s EBT card, and it tells us exactly how much of that price total can be paid for via EBT, and it will not include anything that isn’t food, and it will not include anything considered “pre-prepared” food. It does this automatically AND THERE IS NO OVERRIDE FOR IT. If our machines say that you can’t use the EBT card to pay for something, there is literally nothing we can do to change that, even if we WANTED to.

So no. You can’t buy iPads or cigarettes with food stamps. You can’t withdraw money from casinos or anywhere else with food stamps. You can’t buy dog food with food stamps; sometimes you can’t even buy people food with food stamps. I’m not even sure if you can buy “the big chicken legs” at Disney with food stamps; remember, you can’t buy “any food sold for on-premises consumption” OR any hot foods, and that’s both.

Literally the only thing these fearmongers listed that you can actually purchase with food stamps even if you are in goddamn cahoots with the evil liberal cashier or store manager is soda, and the judgement against people buying that with food stamps is classist fuckwittery at its finest.

So, as always, Fox News is actually flat-out lying, and hateful conservatives both don’t know what they’re talking about and don’t give a fuck about people going through shit that they will never have to go through themselves, and that they in fact don’t have even the tiniest clue about (not even via five seconds’ research; a list of things that can’t be purchased with food stamps is on the Food and Nutrition Services website) but still think they should spout off about to their TV audience anyway.

Reblogged for flawless commentary and explanation.

(Source: sandandglass)

176,904 notes (via malinvoneulerhogan & sandandglass)